Did You Know Your Brain’s Natural Default Is Calm?

Trish Heitz
2 days ago
3 min read

Understanding stress as a barrier, not a shortcoming

Did you know your brain’s natural default is calm?

I didn’t either, and that surprised me.

Recently, in my continuing study of neuroscience to help my clients better understand how to take back ownership of their brain and mind, I revisited research on something called the Default Mode Network (often referred to as the DMN).

What I discovered stopped me in my tracks.

The calm, centered state so many of us are trying to create isn’t something we have to build from scratch. It’s actually our brain’s original setting.

For years, I’ve been teaching people how to create a new default, one where the unconscious belief that is buried below in our unconscious that triggers the stress response and anxiety no longer runs the show and calm becomes primary default. But after reading this research, I realized something important:

This calm state isn’t new at all. Its always been there...We’ve just lost access to it.

Your Brain’s Original Home Base

The Default Mode Network is a network in the brain that becomes most accessible when the nervous system feels safe.

It’s associated with:

reflection instead of reaction
clarity instead of urgency
creativity instead of overthinking
perspective instead of mental looping

In this state, we’re able to think clearly, connect the dots, and make decisions that feel grounded and authentic.

This is the brain’s home base.

So Why Can’t We Access It When We’re Stressed?

Because stress changes what the brain believes is necessary for survival.

When stress becomes chronic — from work pressure, emotional experiences, early misunderstandings, or long-held beliefs — the nervous system shifts into protection mode.

Its job becomes staying alert, not staying reflective.

In that state:

the body stays braced
the mind loops
thinking narrows
perspective shrinks

Not because something is wrong — but because the brain is doing exactly what it learned to do to keep you safe.

Over time, stress becomes the default, and access to the brain’s natural calm becomes harder to reach.

Calm Isn’t Gone-It’s Just Blocked

This is the part most people don’t realize.

The Default Mode Network doesn’t disappear. It doesn’t shut down. It doesn’t abandon us.

It simply becomes less accessible when stress is running the system.

I often describe it like a quiet room inside the brain; a place of clarity and connection. Stress doesn’t destroy the room. It stacks obstacles in front of the door.

The longer stress stays in charge, the harder it feels to even remember that door exists.

Why “Trying to Relax” Often Backfires

This also explains why so many people feel frustrated when they try breathing, meditation, or mindfulness and think:

“It didn’t work.”
“I couldn’t shut my mind off.”
“My body wouldn’t settle.”

From the nervous system’s point of view, slowing down can feel unsafe if constant alertness has been the way it’s stayed protected.

This isn’t resistance. It’s conditioning.

If stress has been the brain’s safety strategy for years, calm won’t feel familiar...yet.

The Way Back Is Practice, Not Force

Here’s the hopeful part.

What the brain learned, it can relearn; gently.

Access to the brain’s natural calm returns when the nervous system experiences repeated moments of safety.

Not through willpower. Not through forcing calm .Not through a single breakthrough.

But through practice.

Small, consistent experiences that teach the brain: “It’s okay to stand down now.”

Over time, those moments rebuild the pathway back to calm.

That’s when people begin to notice:

stress doesn’t hijack them as quickly
the body settles more easily
thinking becomes clearer
decisions feel steadier and more confident

Not because life stopped being stressful — but because stress stopped being the default.

Resetting a Default Isn’t About Fixing Yourself

Resetting stress isn’t about eliminating challenges or changing who you are.

It’s about removing the barriers that block access to your brain’s original state of balance.

The calm you’re looking for isn’t something to achieve. It’s something to return to.

And the way back isn’t dramatic.

It’s quiet. It’s practiced. It’s human.

Ready to Begin Resetting Your Stress Default?

Reset Your Stress Default is a 4-week, guided Zoom experience designed to help your nervous system remember calm, through simple, repeatable practice.